🕵️‍♂️ Life Lessons: High School – Proxy Attendance, and Life – Karma

There are two kinds of education in life—
One you get from textbooks… and the other, from bunking class with strategy and swag.
Guess which one stuck with me?

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🎬 Scene: The Proxy Begins

High school.
Crowded benches. Faded green chalkboard. Professors who believed in “death by dictation.”
And then… there was me.

Peter Parker energy.
Not the cool, web-slinging Spidey. I’m talking Tobey Maguire-level awkward—quiet, decent, nerd-vibes, and slightly invisible.
But behind that mild-mannered exterior…
was a proxy attendance mafia boss.

45–60 people in class.
Half of them missing.
25 of them invisible.
And yet—somehow—all present.

“Sir, Sharma… check.”
“Sir, Yadav… check.”
“Sir, Batra… check.”
(Who? No idea. But he lives in my register now.)

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🎒 A Day in the Life of a Proxy Master

7:30 AM – Wake up late, brush teeth while mentally scanning the roll number list.
8:15 AM – Walk into class, wearing the confidence of a surgeon with a fake signature scalpel.
9:00 AM – Professor calls roll. My time to shine.
Hand raised. Voice modified. Timing perfect.

“Present, Sir!” – for the 5th name in a row.

Meanwhile, real students are confused:

“Wait, was that me or Sharma?”

Every day was an Oscar-worthy performance.
But instead of applause, I got a nod from the professor.
Which, in our world, is a standing ovation.

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🧠 If Proxying Was a Subject, I’d Have Topped

Let’s be honest—
Nobody remembers how to solve a trigonometric identity,
But we all remember how to mark “P” with a different pen ink to fake presence in lab records.

If there was a subject called “Attendance Jugaad 101”?
I’d be gold medalist. Dean’s list.
Possibly even Nobel Peace Prize winner for ensuring classroom peace by increasing the attendance average.

And don’t even get me started on the art of signature mimicry.

“Your Batra’s slant is slightly different today.”
“It’s fine. He’s evolving as a person.”

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😅 Why Did I Do It?

Because relevance.

You see, I wasn’t the “party guy.”
I wasn’t the “crush-worthy guitarist.”
I wasn’t even the “teacher’s pet.”

I was the quiet kid who gave you a fake attendance and asked nothing in return.
My version of making friends.
My way of saying, “Hey, I exist. Even if you don’t know me.”

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😬 What Did I Learn?

Oh, buckle up.
Because the universe has a sense of humor.

Cut to: Graduation College.
Freedom. Independence. No uniform.
And no one to do my proxy.

Result?

• Attendance: 15%
• Internal marks: Missing in action
• Professors: “Who are you again?”
• Me: “Sir, I was there… spiritually.”

I bunked college like it was my birthright.
While the 25 people I vouched for in high school probably became engineers, CEOs, or life coaches,
I became a ghost in the attendance register.

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🧪 What Would I Tell Young Me?

Dear Proxy King,
You were brilliant.
But next time, do it for people who’ll at least say “hi” in the corridor. 😆

Also, maybe keep a balance?
Help 5 people. Then attend 5 classes. Then bunk 5 classes.
(Okay fine, 10 bunked. But with strategy.)

Oh, and learn actual signatures.
Because matching Batra’s stroke pattern isn’t a life skill, bro.

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🧓 10 Years Later: The Twist Nobody Saw Coming

So, here’s the real kicker.

Cut to a decade later.
Corporate conference.
I’m standing awkwardly at a networking table, sipping overpriced coffee, and this guy walks in—confident, suave, talking about education reforms.

Someone whispers,

“That’s Dean Yadav. Big shot in some university now.”

Yadav? That name…
Flashback to high school.
Roll No. 38.
One of my OG 25 proxy people.

I go up. Smile. Say, “Hey, we were in the same class in high school. I used to do your proxy…”

Blank stare.

“Sorry, I don’t remember.”

Of course, he didn’t.
But karma did.
That slap was spiritual. 🥲

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🎯 Life Lessons from the Great Proxy Saga:

1. 🎭 Don’t do proxies for people you’ll never meet again.
2. 🧠 Being invisible doesn’t mean being irrelevant.
3. 🪞 Sometimes the things we do to feel seen… make us disappear from our own story.
4. 📚 High school teaches you funny things. Life teaches you the punchline.

“Life Lessons from a Proxy King”

Quick Gun Murugun Style: Masala-loaded. Karma-approved. 🔫🍿

Life lessons, saar, come from pain,
Not textbook, not chalk, not academic chain.
Not from algebra or chemical sessions,
But from bunking class—that’s where I got life lessons. 📚😏

Proxy is art, not classroom crime,
One “Present Sir!” — saved 25 on time.
Roll calls feared me, professors guessed,
My signature game? Better than the rest! 🖊️
And behind all that… hid more life lessons.

I didn’t know ‘em, not one, not two,
Yet did their proxy—like a ghost crew! 👻
Why? Because I needed some attention,
Turns out, life lessons come with suspension. 😬

In college, I vanished like my attendance sheet,
Those 25? Thriving. Me? In repeat.
Watched American Pie, played chess and carrom,
Attendance? 15%. Regret? Full-bharam. 🥲

But one fine day, plot twist delight,
Dean Yadav stood, all blazer bright.
I walked up proud, “Proxy, remember?”
He blinked and said, “Bro, never.” 😐
Boom. Karma. Another life lesson bites.

I learnt life lessons in bunked lectures,
In stolen signatures and chalkboard textures.
In ghost classmates and forged presence,
In every “present” yelled with essence.

So here I am, full grown, full wise,
Still shouting “Present!” under the skies.
Because if nothing else, through all the sessions…
I walked away with pure gold life lessons. 💡🔥

🎤 Final Roll Call:

Life lessons don’t wait for exams,
They hide in proxies, regrets, and scams.
So bunk if you must, but take the essence…
Because no one forgets a real-life lesson’s presence.

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🎤 Mic Drop

So yeah.
High school didn’t teach me calculus.
But it taught me character, confidence, and how karma files its own attendance sheet.

The 25 don’t remember me.
But I remember them—because thanks to them,
I bunked college, flunked attendance, and found a story to laugh about today.

Yours in nostalgia, mischief, and unverified presence,

🚀 Lucifer Morningstar

💬 Did YOU ever do a proxy or get one? And if yes, who was your Batra? Let’s unroll that register in the comments! 😄

Watch out for more posts on The Jugnu Express

Thank you for reading, if you liked this then check our earlier post on Saying No

Saying No: Powerful YES That Begins With 1 NO