How do you use social media?
How Do I Use Social Media? Badly. With Regret. And Zero ROI.
(Also, where is Orkut when you need emotional support?)
If you ask Gen Z how they use social media, they’ll say:
“To express myself, build my brand, connect with my audience.”
If you ask me?
I use it like a lost uncle who still thinks Orkut might come back.
📱 I Don’t Use Social Media. Social Media Uses Me
Let me be honest:
Blogging is the only “social” thing I do — and even there, I talk to myself, post memes no one asked for, and overshare like I’m writing diary entries for my therapist.
Instagram? Too aesthetic.
Twitter/X? Too angry.
LinkedIn? Too fake.
Facebook? What is this, 2008?
I log in, scroll for 4 minutes, compare myself with 19 people who just bought property in Goa, and log out with “maybe I should become a monk” energy.
🕰️ I’m a Product of the Pre-Filter Era
Let’s put this in context:
- Born in the late 80s
- Went to school in the 90s
- Got trauma disguised as degrees in the early 2000s
- Currently working so my family can eat paneer twice a week
And somewhere in this journey, social media happened.
And I never caught up.
I still take screenshots instead of saving reels.
I read YouTube comments like novels.
And I think “content creator” sounds like an Avengers-level job.
😩 Modern Platforms Give Me Performance Anxiety
- Reels need dancing.
- Threads need hot takes.
- Pinterest needs taste.
- And TikTok? Needs my soul.
Meanwhile, I’m here trying to caption a blog post without sounding like a philosophical DJ.
“Here’s my take on life, love, and why people should stop saying ‘vibes’.”
0 likes. 1 cousin reads it by mistake.
📡 The Algorithm Hates Me Personally
Some people say the algorithm is neutral.
I say it has beef with me.
How else do you explain:
- Me posting a deep, emotional caption = 2 likes (one of them is mine)
- Me misspelling “goodnight” = 14 shares and a comment from my ex
“Boosted post”? I can’t even boost my own morale.
📲 I Don’t Scroll. I Spiral.
Social media is not a tool for me — it’s a full-blown overthinking machine.
I open Instagram to check one reel and suddenly I’m:
- Rewatching breakup edits of strangers
- Thinking about a dog who got adopted in Finland
- Wondering if my last like ruined someone’s algorithmic destiny
I go for a scroll and come back with an identity crisis.
🧓 Influencer? Sorry, I’m a ‘Fluencer
While others are influencing skincare, crypto, and productivity apps…
I’m out here influencing my friends to:
- Cancel weekend plans
- Overanalyze emoji responses
- And romanticize childhood trauma
No ring lights. No affiliate codes. Just emotional content™.
💻 Blogging Is My Only Flex (And Cry For Help)
My blog is my corner of the internet.
No filters. No algorithms.
Just pure, unfiltered chaos sprinkled with philosophy, sarcasm, and references no one under 25 will get.
It’s not a trend. It’s a lifestyle disorder.
🧠 The Only Reel I Make Is in My Head
Forget trends.
Forget lip-syncs.
The only reels I excel at?
The ones I overplay in my mind at 3 AM while regretting everything I’ve ever posted.
And even those don’t go viral.
Just mental.
📱 “I Use Social Media Like It’s a Trap (Because It Is)”
They say, “Be consistent. Post every day.”
But I use social media to spiral, not slay.
Likes? Elusive. Comments? Few.
Still, I use social media like it’s something I knew.I scroll like it’s research, click like it’s love,
Compare my life to strangers from above.
I don’t post reels, I just envy a few—
That’s how I use social media (like therapy with ads too).I joined to connect, to laugh and be free,
Now I use social media to doubt being me.
My food goes cold while I frame the shot,
Only to delete it later. (Perfection? Not.)Once I wrote poems and doodled with ink,
Now I use social media to overthink.
Who viewed my story? Why didn’t they like?
Why do I check stats at 3:45 at night?I use social media to feel less alone,
While ignoring the friends calling my phone.
Digital noise, emotional spam—
Feels like joy, but also a scam.Sometimes I vanish, ghost the apps,
Tell myself, “No more dopamine traps.”
But boredom strikes, and like déjà vu,
I use social media… because what else to do?It teaches me trends, and random hacks,
Like how to fold shirts or file my tax.
And though I forget what I came to view,
I still use social media like I have nothing to do.My bio says, “Here for the vibes.”
But inside I’m drowning in comment replies.
I don’t create, I mostly scroll,
Use social media? Nah. I surrender control.And yet it lures me, like a glowing screen,
Tells me I matter, keeps my page clean.
I know it’s a loop—but can’t break through—
Because I use social media more than I wanted to.So here’s my truth, in this digital storm,
I’m an analog soul in a pixelled form.
Some days I post, some days I brew,
But either way—I use social media… and it uses me too.
🎯 Final Thoughts?
I don’t “use” social media.
I stare at it like a ghost from the 90s trying to understand the modern world.
And while the world is busy going viral over oat milk and airport outfits, I’ll be here:
Blogging.
Overthinking.
Pretending I know what “engagement rate” means.
And wondering if MSN Messenger was actually ahead of its time.
Yours in hashtags, heartbreak, and a hopeless blog addiction,
🚀 Lucifer Morningstar
💬 Do you feel like social media evolved without you? Or are you still tagging friends in memes while quietly plotting your digital disappearance? Drop your confessions below.
Watch out for more posts on The Jugnu Express
Thank you for reading, if you liked this then check our earlier post on Rain In Summer
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